life events Archives - Author K. Williams

♦Welcome to another edition of the Open Book Blog Hop!♦

Topic #97

What Life Events Shaped You Into Who You Are?
If you could think about all the events that unfolded in your life,
which ones shaped you into who you are now?

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Where do I start? I can’t account for everything that shaped me in my life. It was Freud who said that we learn and shape who we are in the first five years of life. I think, to a large extent, that he is right about that specfically, despite being way too obsessed with sexuality (not everything is about that cigar). So, really what we are talking about are the things that changed us during our lives and made us into the adult we have become, despite our formative years.

There are so many things that happen to us over the years, both good and bad. Much of those events are forgotten, even ones that had an affect. Yet, they still managed to shape our outlook and behavior. What are those things for me?

School and the socialization obtained there.
At a very young age, we hop a bus and go off to school (most of us). There we meet people our own age and make friends. It’s traumatic. You leave your home, which should be a sanctuary for you, to go to a strange place with people you don’t know. Even if you’ve been versed in a lot of education and children’s television, the actual act of socialization is awkward and uncomfortable until you can gauge the other people and how you fit. I for one struggled with this, because many of my classmates somehow knew each other (preschool and daycare, perhaps), and I was the odd one out. My treatment was to be ostracized.
What did I learn from this? To trust people less and that the world can be ice cold. I’m very careful with how I interact with strangers, expecting to be bullied or simply ignored. Things do not change in adulthood. I wish that they did. Social media is a great example of it!
Having a sibling and family interested in me and my development.
I’ll write about this more in depth in the future (come back to see the article in late August). Mom and dad made sure I had plenty of reading material. The opportunity to ask questions of them was always open. Our relationship was so strong, I could ask them anything. And, more importantly, my parents are very intelligent people who lived good lives in time for me to learn from them. Their values, in my opinion, are solid. That was passed to me.
My brother is almost five years older than me. Although we were at each other’s throats as siblings do, I learned a lot from watching him test his boundaries and grow. It was an interesting window into the psyche of boys and young men. I’m happy to say that he’s grown to be a wonderful man and fantastic father.
Being raised with pets, especially dogs.
There is nothing better, except reading, for developing empathy and a love for the natural world than owning a pet. I’ve had dogs, birds, a guinea pig, a hamster, and fish. I loved them all. And, they, I hope cared for me in return. They taught me to be a better communicator, by being able to read their needs without a shared language. Their affection, regardless of my state, taught me the importance of unconditional love.

There are a lot more details than this, but remembering things from early on takes some time. I’d need to take a few days strolling through my memories to really get it all together. That’s hard to find time for. Plus, there are things that are uncomfortable to talk about, so they are left out.

Let’s hop on over and see what the other authors have to say on the topic…